“Miscarriage, Medical Termination & the Grief That Follows”
When Grief Is Unseen – Navigating Loss After Miscarriage or Medical Termination
At Zoe’s Place, we walk alongside many people facing the heartbreak of early pregnancy loss. Among the most painful and often misunderstood experiences are miscarriage and termination due to medical reasons. These forms of grief are deeply real — yet they are often invisible to the outside world.
What Is Disenfranchised Grief?
Disenfranchised grief is a type of grief that isn’t widely recognised or acknowledged by society. It occurs when a person’s loss isn’t seen as “valid” or doesn’t fit into people’s expectations of what grief should look like.
When someone loses a parent, partner or child later in life, the world often responds with condolences, rituals, and open support. But when someone experiences a miscarriage or is forced to make a heartbreaking medical decision about their pregnancy, the response is often silence — or worse, minimisation.
They may hear things like:
“You can try again.”
“At least it was early.”
“You did the right thing.”
“Everything happens for a reason.”
These phrases may be well-meaning, but they can leave a grieving person feeling even more isolated. Their grief becomes disenfranchised — quietly carried, rarely acknowledged.
What Grief Might Look Like After Miscarriage or Termination
There is no “normal” way to grieve these losses. For some, grief arrives immediately and fiercely. For others, it is delayed — emerging weeks, months, or even years later. Common feelings include:
Deep sadness or emptiness
Guilt or shame
Anger or frustration at the situation or medical system
Anxiety about future pregnancies or health
Disconnection from others or feeling misunderstood
These emotions may be compounded by physical recovery, hormonal changes, and the sudden end of plans, dreams, and identity as a parent. For those who’ve made a medical decision to end a pregnancy — often after devastating news — the grief can be layered with complex feelings of doubt, relief, pain, or responsibility. It is real, and it deserves to be seen.
You Are Not Alone
Grief does not follow a timeline. There is no “right way” to process this kind of loss. What matters is knowing you do not have to walk through it alone.
At Zoe’s Place, we offer free, confidential support to anyone grieving a miscarriage or a pregnancy that ended due to medical circumstances. Whether your loss was recent or long ago, we are here to provide a safe space — with no judgment, no assumptions, and no expectation of how your grief should look.
You don’t need to have the right words. You just need a place to be heard.
If you’re navigating this journey, please reach out. Your grief is real. Your story matters. And healing is possible — in your own time, and in your own way.
🕊️
If you or someone you love needs support, we welcome a self-referral from you!
Contact | Self Referral — Zoes Place
Zoe’s Place is compassionate and confidential.
