Every woman’s experience after a termination is different.
You may feel relief, sadness, grief, guilt, uncertainty or a mixture of emotions. You might feel confident in your decision and still find parts of the experience difficult. Or you may not know exactly how you feel yet.
There is no right or wrong emotional response to a termination, and there is no timeline for how you should feel afterwards.
When you don't know who to talk to
Sometimes the difficult part isn't only what you're feeling — it's not knowing who you can talk to about it.
You may have supportive people around you but worry they won't understand. Your partner may be processing the experience differently. You might be concerned about being judged by family or friends, or perhaps very few people even know you were pregnant.
Sometimes you simply don't want to talk to someone who has an opinion about how you should feel.
Having someone outside your usual circle can give you the freedom to speak honestly.
You don't have to need counselling
Reaching out to Zoe’s Place doesn't mean signing up for counselling or committing to ongoing appointments.
You can talk with us just once.
Maybe you've had a difficult day and need someone to listen. Perhaps something has brought the experience back to mind. You might want to talk through an emotion you weren't expecting, or simply say something out loud that you haven't felt able to say to anyone else.
Think of us as someone extra in your support circle when you need it.
And if one conversation is all you need, that's okay.
If you decide you'd like further support, we're here for that too.
Feelings can change over time
For some women, emotions are strongest immediately following a termination. For others, feelings may emerge or change weeks, months or even years later.
A new relationship, another pregnancy, an anniversary or a significant life event can sometimes bring previous experiences back to mind.
That doesn't mean there is something wrong with you or that your previous feelings weren't genuine. Our experiences can hold different meanings for us at different stages of our lives.
Sometimes having a safe place to explore what has come up can help.
Finding someone who will really listen
Whether you're talking with a friend, counsellor or another support person, you deserve to feel safe and respected.
It can help to ask yourself:
Do I feel comfortable talking honestly with this person?
Do I feel listened to?
Can I talk without worrying about judgement?
Are my feelings being respected rather than interpreted for me?
Am I being given space to explore my own thoughts and values?
Good support isn't about telling you how you should feel. It's about meeting you where you are.
A safe place at Zoe’s Place
Zoe’s Place provides free, confidential and trauma-informed post-termination support.
Our approach is values-based and non-directive. We won't impose our beliefs on you or tell you how you should understand your experience. We work within your individual circumstances, values and beliefs.
You might want one conversation, occasional check-ins or more ongoing support.
You don't have to know what you need before you contact us.
Sometimes you just need someone extra in your circle who will listen.
Whether your termination was recent or many years ago, you're welcome at Zoe’s Place.
No pressure. No judgement. Your story matters.
Get Support contact us here.
